Ankis Identity

Over the past few days the only thoughts going around in my head are the ones of total defeat, suffering, and hurtfulness. My "supposedly" great friends seem to have disappeared from the earth. When you really need them where are they? I need you! Maybe I am being critical, but when a friend needs you, then your only duty in life is to be there for them. Then why can't mine be there for me when I need them. Have i done something wrong? Did i make them angry? Did I ignore them? Then came the thought of my future. When your friends are not there, you cannot help but fall back to the cycle of sadness and suffering for your future. The feelings of defeat are back in your mind. Mr Bf says that defeat is nothing but education and it just leads to the first step to something better but how can i move on, when i cannot even face the thought of admitting defeat. All this seems dense as i say yet again but then why cant i move on. Should I try fix my future, should i wait?? Why did I let this happen?!?! Sorry ladies and gentes for the sadness in my blogs, just finding it hard to bounce back from complete defeat.Thanks Mr Bf, you know who you are, for being there for me when I need you the most
OxO Anki Oxo